This column features books, articles, and websites, recommended by our authors and people from the RAVSAK network, pertaining to the theme of the current issue of HaYidion for readers who want to investigate the topic in greater depth.

Arnee Winshall, the founding chair of JCDS, Boston’s Jewish Community Day School, and a nationally recognized leader in Jewish education, will assume the role of chair of the first RAVSAK Board of Directors at the upcoming annual meeting in January. Working with Executive Director Marc Kramer, Arnee will guide the transition from the original grassroots, Executive Committee structure made up solely of day school professionals to an international governing board of extraordinary lay and professional leadership committed to ensuring the future of RAVSAK.

Three wonderful weeks in Israel this summer reinforced why I love being in Jewish education. Walking the streets of Jerusalem, Haifa or Tel Aviv, sitting in cafes or hiking in the Golan bind us to our history and culture. Our school’s very special partnership with the Reali School in Haifa puts faces on the Israelis for all of us at Wornick; working with their teachers and administrators makes us realize how we share so many similar concerns. We also share a priority for what RAVSAK has long spoken of—amiyut: peoplehood.

The headline in the Forward reads: “The Jewish Mother Revisited: Goodbye, Mrs. Portnoy, Hello, Bad Mommy.” A forthcoming book is entitled Hell is Other Parents and Other Tales of Maternal Combustion. An article in the New Jersey Jewish Standard promotes “Helping Kids Thrive With the Coach Approach to Parenting.” On the parenting shelf of the public library sits Straight Talk About Your Child’s Mental Health: What to Do When Something Seems Wrong. Parenting in the Age of Anxiety is extremely stressful.

Listen into any teachers’ lounge conversation or administrative meeting, and it is only a matter of time before the talk veers towards an issue that is on the minds—and the nerves—of virtually every professional working in our schools today: the aggressive and disrespectful behavior of too many … parents. Whether referred to as aggressive, entitled, difficult, adversarial, helicoptering, hovering or high maintenance, such parents have shaken the traditional, deferential relationship between family and school unlike any school-related phenomenon we have seen in recent decades. As noted psychologist and independent school consultant Michael Thompson has stated, “Every teacher [and administrator] has been scarred by at least one threatening out-of-control parent.”

There is something to be said for the old adage that “there are no problem students, only problem parents.”

Early in my career I heard a story of a head of school who sent his children to a different school in town so that the challenges of working as a professional and being a parent would never have to become an issue. In my case it was for precisely the opposite reason that I decided to enter the field of Jewish education… I wanted specifically to be the head of school for my own children’s Jewish community day school experience!

Last year, the 235-student Hebrew Academy of Morris County (HAMC) in Randolph, New Jersey, decided to take part in the Butterfly Project, launched by the San Diego Jewish Academy with the goal of creating 1.5 million butterflies in memory of all the children who died in the Holocaust. Naomi Bacharach, director of marketing and development at the school, and other administrators did not want students to work on their art projects in a vacuum—they knew the project would have more meaning if they invited grandparents to take part as well, painting side-by-side with the children and sharing their families’ histories.

I think that all of us who work with parents know that since parents are getting more and more used to being approached about fundraising and are more and more involved in their child’s college experience, there is great potential to engage them as donors.

Should parents be board members? Pros: Since parents along with their children are the major consumers of Jewish Day schools, it is vital to the school to listen to their voices. Aside from fulfilling their role as parents, they possess many talents, interests and skills that are valuable assets and can be utilized by the board to fulfill its vision and strategic plan. Building a board is more than simply filling slots. It is about being strategic in the way a board looks at its composition and its operations. A board, under the guidance of its committee of trustees, should continually profile and evaluate its membership. Utilizing this information the board can identify, cultivate, and recruit new members who are well suited to assist the board in meeting its action plan needs. If potential new members are also parents, there could be an additional benefit. Parents have chosen the school as the best place to educate their children. Current parents who are pleased with the school approach their board responsibilities with a unique passion.